Recognizing and Applying Effective Behaviors as a Mentor.

How do you know where to draw the line with your mentee? Certain behaviors, although coming from a place of kindness, can harm your mentee and it is normal not to know what behavior to adopt to provide growth. In the context of a mentoring relationship, there are several behaviors that researchers have identified as effective and ineffective. It is useful to know how to distinguish them to be able to support your mentee adequately.

What are effective behaviors?

• Adopting a positive attitude at all times,
• Demonstrating listening skills and showing empathy,
• Demonstrating sincere curiosity towards your mentee,
• Being patient with progress and obstacles,
• Guiding toward possible solutions,
• Being honest and impartial,
• Motivating by inspiring action and cheering successes,
• Being humble and authentic,

As can be seen from the list, effective behaviors usually highlight the mentors' listening skills, their benevolence, and sincere interest in their mentees. Therefore, it is important to adopt a positive attitude about the path and progress of the mentee, by showing listening skills and showing empathy. By being open and interested in your mentee, you build a relationship of trust through which you can guide him towards possible solutions. In addition, adopting a motivating speech encourages your mentee to overcome obstacles. Finally, honesty and authenticity are essential because they allow the relationship to be established on solid foundations.

What are ineffective behaviors?

• Resolving your mentee’s issues,
• Taking responsibility for your mentee's problems,
• Being overprotective,
• Only giving negative feedback,
• Avoiding difficult development work,
• Protecting your mentee from obstacles,
• Diminishing the sense of belonging,
• Over-complimenting your mentee,

As for the ineffective behaviors on this list, they are often linked to inadequate involvement on the part of the mentor. For example, trying to solve your mentee’s problems, overprotecting him, or complimenting him in excessive ways. These behaviors do not allow the mentee to develop his autonomy and his judgment. Remember that ultimately, your role is to guide and advise!

Yvette Fortier describes in her testimony how she applies effective behaviors with her mentee: “I listen actively. I ask the right questions and encourage the mentee to speak to know his needs/objectives. I don't do the work for him. He has to do some homework. I guide him. »